Battles that aren’t worth fighting

During this quarantine, we did succeed to eat a lot more than we have expected, in the beginning. So, stake after stake, sweet after sweet, snack after snack, we did manage to put on a few pounds.

Some of us might have had a few more in plus, while some have gained just the right amount for a healthy organism at their height. But people tend to notice, and at times, make the wrong comments when they are not required.

Take my example, I went down the road to give my best friend fresh diary from the countryside (from my last weekend visit), and a group of people started making nasty comments.

I am aware that I wasn’t dressed to kill. Imagine messy-dry hair, less makeup, short pants, tee-shirt, and a pair of comfy sneakers. And here I was, on my way ready to bring my friend the vegetables, when they started laughing by my back and making comments.

At first I have ignored it and went on my way, because I had to see my friend. On the way back, I took some time to notice the ones that were blabbering on my back.

A group of people were laying on a car front while chewing on sunflower seeds and making a mess around them. And then I knew, that fighting them was not the best idea and that I need to move further.

I am not a racist person, I respect and value all persons, no matter their color, religion, or belief, but at times, gypsies can be irritant and cause trouble.

I am aware that during this quarantine I managed to gain a few pounds and look a little bit different, but that does not make me a fat person. Having 60 kg at 1.70 height is more than enough.

Nevertheless, this motivated me, and I decided to start going to the gym with one of my girlfriends. Working out at home can turn bad when there is nobody to motivate you, and you turn lazy in time.

July is going to be the month of resolutions for me and for making the right decisions for my future. In regards to the people, let them talk, I could not care less. They are just noise in the background.

It’s important to know that some fights are not ours to take on and that we should move on. Why waste energy on persons that don’t even matter and get angry over nothing?

Some battles aren’t worth fighting.

Because we have to let go

Time has flown away since the last post. Everything appeared to vanish so soon in this quarantine that I don’t even know when it occurred and most importantly, if all of it was just a bad dream.

I was telling you in the last post that my cousin, Costel has passed away recently. His death was more of a shock to me because I could not believe it was true. 

Things just happened in such a rush and very unexpectedly, and the worst part is that I could not do anything to prevent it or at least, lead him on his last road.

He was eventually brought back from the hospital and buried yesterday, without any funeral services. There were only a handful of people that led him to his grave, way too soon than anyone can expect.

I was just put in the face with the harsh reality, and had to accept it. That night when I heard the news I could not sleep and stayed awake until 6 AM in the morning. I kept thinking about the death and my parents, and family, and felt bad that I was not able to protect them.

What worries me more, is that a hospital near my parent’s house holds 369 infected persons and patients (with Covid-19), some of the affected ones being neighbors and close friends of the family.

This virus keeps us away from the ones that we love and sometimes is just so hard to bear and to wait, and do nothing. We get to see the life happening in front of our eyes, but don’t have the power to interfere and to change things. It breaks my heart when I realize that staying apart is the best way we can protect them. I was never good at staying apart.

A few pieces of advice

At this moment, everything that I can do, that WE can do is to stay apart and pray. God is the only one that can help us get through these moments, and it’s important to realize that we are not alone.

And if our family members, friends, and colleagues are being affected by the virus and even taken away, let’s be thankful and appreciate the moments that we spent together.

Let’s realize that the persons that have died, are not dead in our heart, and they will only pass away if we forget them. We cannot lose what we have enjoyed deeply once, because all that we love deeply becomes a part of us.

It’s important to understand that it’s not the length of life that matters, but the depth of it. Rumi said that „Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with heart and soul there is no such thing as separation.”

Be brave, be strong

Let’s allow our lives to reflect the faith that we have in God. Fear nothing and pray about everything. We often forget to pray and say thank you when good happens, but isn’t God with us when good things happen as well?

It’s time to be courageous in a situation like this when everyone around us feels lost. Let’s be willing to push through fear, in spite of feeling it so heavy. Step up, and lead ourselves, let’s be brave because we can.

We fail to realize that strength doesn’t come from winning, but from struggles and hardships that we go through in this life. When dark times come, like the pandemic, let’s not give up. Let’s be strong, trust the process and God, because every battle prepares us for the next war.