Thought of the day 9#

      Nici nu stiu cu ce ar trebui sa incep… .Ma rezum totusi la faptul ca mi-a fost dor de blog, de voi. Am avut o saptamana incarcata de sentimente si intamplari, care mai de care mai ample si mai putin iritante.

Dupa cum am povestit in articolele precedente, am finalizat un capitol prematur inceput din aceasta viata. Acum, sunt in cautarea unui nou capitol, mai bun si prosper insa din pacate nu-mi gasesc inspiratia, imi lipsesc randuri din cartea vietii si privesc la pagini goale.

Caut raspunsuri in locuri diverse, ma afund in amalgamuri de noi informatii si acumulez… din pacate mari nimicuri.

Imi petrec ore in sir in fata ecranului alb, pe site-uri specializate cautand indicii despre viitor, despre scopuri si dorinte. Ma innec intr-o baie de multime, socializez cu necunoscuti dar nimeni nu pare sa imi fure inima. Tot ceea ce acumulez sunt promisiuni si fagaduieli desarte.

Ma afund in ganduri felurite si visez la noi apusuri, la noi orizonturi.

Un element statornic si din ce in ce mai prezent este speranta. Si incapatinarea. Faptul ca imi cunosc puterile si aspiratiile ma determina sa nu renunt, sa duc lupta la un alt nivel. De foarte multe ori, din pacate ma lovesc de ziduri mari prin care nu trec sabiile launtrice si razboiul se opreste pentru cateva momente.

In ciuda lacrimilor amar-sarate ce se revarsa pe chip, imi ridic armele ca un soldat ranit si continui sa caut raspunsuri, continui sa caut o cale de iesire.

Un lucru e cert si sigur. Inapoi nu am cum sa ma mai intorc, si o cale de mijloc nu exista. Din toate incercarile la care am fost supusa pana in prezent am invatat ca trebuie sa imi pastrez calmul si orice as face nu trebuie sa renunt.

Sansele mele exista, chiar daca in acest moment ma invart intr-un cerc de ceata si nesiguranta. Va aparea si locul potrivit pentru mine, doar ca se afla pe undeva, la capatul vreunui tunel intunecat.

Sunt constienta ca aceasta incercare are un rol important si voi avea ceva de invatat. De asemenea stiu ca in urma acestui capitol incetosat ultimele randuri vor concluziona de ce restul paginilor sunt voalate, si ca de fapt trebuiau simtite nicidecum citite limpede.

Sursa Unsplash

English version


I do not even know what I should start with … . I still have to summarize the fact that I missed the blog, I missed you. I have had a week full of emotions and events that were more ample and less irritating.

As I have mentioned in the previous articles, I have completed a premature chapter from this life. Now, I’m looking for a new chapter, better and prosperous, but unfortunately I can not find my inspiration, I miss the rows of the book of life and look at blank pages.
I’m looking for answers in various places, I am amalgamous with new information and I am collecting … unfortunately nothing importantly big.

I spend hours in front of the white screen on specialized sites looking for clues about the future, about goals and desires. I drown in a bath of many unknown people, socialize with strangers, but nobody seems to steal my heart. All that I accumulate are vague promises.
I am caught in various thoughts and I dream of new landscapes and new horizons.

A steadfast and more and more present element is hope. And stubborness. Being aware of my powers and aspirations causes me not to give up, to take the fight to another level. Many times, unfortunately, they hit me with large walls that do not cross the inner swords and the war stops for a few moments.

Despite the bitter-salty tears streaming over my face, I pick up my weapons as a wounded soldier and continue to look for answers, continuing to look for a way out.

One thing is certain.I can not get back, and a middle way does not exist. From all the trials I have been subjected to so far I have learned that I must keep my calm and whatever I do I do not have to give up.

My chances exist, even if at this moment I’m in a circle of fog and insecurity. There will also be a right place for me, just somewhere at the end of a dark tunnel.

I am aware that this test has an important role and I will have something to learn. I also know that after this blurred chapter the last lines will conclude why the rest of the pages are veiled, and that they really should not have been read but felt crystal clean.


Sfarsitul unui capitol inceput prematur/The End of a Chapter Began Prematurely

         Stiti acel moment din viata cand credeti ca totul merge ca pe roate? Cand esti fericit ca ai un job decent in domeniu, cand in familie si in viata de cuplu lucrurile par sa infloreasca pe zi ce trece? Si apoi, mai stiti, din nou, cand unul din acesti stalpi ai vietii se prabuseste? …. .

Deunazi am luat decizia de a inceta cooperarea cu societatea la care lucram. Am ales in acest mod deoarece am simtit ca nu este pentru mine, ca nu fac ceea ce trebuie.

Serviciul trebuie sa fie locul in care mergi cu placere, in care desfasori activitatile intr-un mod calm, fara batai de cap, locul in care mergi cu gandul ca stii ce trebuie sa faci, ca esti necesar si indispensabil. Or, cand situatia se prezinta in mod opus, cand este dezorganizare, cand se utilizeaza un limbaj nepotrivit si tonul, volumul cu care ti se adreseaza este dur si ridicat iti pierzi din avant si speranta.

Recunosc ca sunt afectata. Mi-am pus toata dorinta, toata speranta si tot sufletul in acest proiect. Am crezut ca acel job este pentru mine, ca ma defineste si ca voi ajunge sa ma dezvolt intr-un mediu familial, placut si cald.

O lectie de viata

      Desi am petrecut 3 luni in cadrul acelei companii, nu regret. Am avut de invatat cateva lucruri esentiale, ce cred eu, m-au slefuit agresiv si cu rost:

    1. In primul rand, lumea nu e roz. Nu toata lumea iti este prietena si in nici un caz nu toata lumea iti vrea binele;
    1. Nimeni nu o sa te ajute in evolutia ta, si daca iti doresc o ascensiune atunci tu esti singura persoana ce ti-o poate asigura;
    1. Ai grija ce comportament afisezi fata de ceilalti, fii atenta ce sentimente si stari daruiesti celor din jur, pot fi interpretate gresit. Nu te plange, ridica-te precum un pheonix din propria cenusa si mergi mai departe;
    1. Cheia catre o cariera de succes nu este sa te pui bine pe langa sefi. Poate, pe moment ti se poate arata „o fata morgana”, poate o sa intalnesti persoane fara stima de sine. Refuza din start si continua drumul tau; daca consideri ca nu esti lasata  in pace sa iti desfasori activitatile, pleaca.
    1. Fiecare persoana are propriile griji, nevoi si aspiratii. Insirandu-le pe ale tale in fata lor nu numai ca nu o sa te faca sa cresti, dar o sa te faca sa devii si slab;
    1. Ai grija ce vorbesti; vorbeste putin, calm si cu sens. Sunt unele informatii ce poate pentru tine par nesemnificative dar pentru altii sunt importante si secrete;
    1. Asculta inainte sa vorbesti. E posibil sa ai mai mult de castigat daca dai mai multa atentie cuvintelor celorlalti, e posibil sa eviti un anumit esec;
    1. Nu te grabi!!! Pentru mine, aceasta este o adevarata corvoada. Personal am fost extrem de iute si zapacita, nu ascultam pana la capat si faceam lucrurile rapid si fara noima. In momentul cand am realizat acest lucru si am facut lucrurile in logica si calm, mi s-a reprosat ca sunt inceata si ca nu gandesc logic; persoanele au tinut sa creada ce au intuit de la inceput despre mine si m-au invinuit si pe parcurs pentru acel defect, desi l-am corectat.
  1. Nu te pierde in fata persoanelor cu „grade”. In fata lui Dumnezeu, toti suntem egali, faptul ca sunt anumite persoane ce au functii mai inalte decat tine nu ar trebui sa te intimideze. Priveste persoanele in ochi serios, si afirma-te. Daca ai dreptate si ai facut ceea ce este corect, atunci nu ar trebui sa existe probleme.
  2. Apreciaza ceea ce ai. Desi am schimbat multe joburi pe parcursul studiilor, nu am realizat vreodata ca atmosfera de la locul de munca poate fi atat de importanta.
  3. Pastreaza o postura corecta. Adopta o pozitie dreapta, fara maini incrucisate si fara maini la spate. Vei parea mai demn si mai serios.
  4. Multumeste-i lui Dumnezeu. Este un motiv prin care ai trecut prin ce ai trecut. Poate ca Dumnezeu a vrut sa te incerce, sa iti testeze abilitatile si caracterul, sa te slefuiasca. Desi ai obosit in parcurgerea acelui munte, desi privelistea de final nu se compara cu ce te asteptai, ceea ce este cu adevarat important este calatoria, drumul parcurs si ce ai invatat.

La sfarsitul acestui articol vreau sa subliniez ca nu regret decizia luata, si ca in nici un caz nu imi pare rau ca am petrecut 3 luni de zile in cadrul acelei companii. Consider ca am invatat lucruri importante si esentiale ce ma vor ajuta la viitorul job si care ma vor forma ca persoana in aceasta viata.

„Sfârşitul nu este nici sfârşit, nici început, ci o continuare, cu toată înţelepciunea pe care ne-o insuflă experienţa.” – Hal Borland.

English version

        Do you know that moment in your life when you think everything is going well? When you are happy that you have a decent job in the field, when in the family and in the life of the couple things seem to blossom by the day that passes? And then, do you know again, when one of these poles of life collapses?

I made the decision to end the cooperation with the society I worked for. I chose this because I felt it was not for me that I was not doing the right thing.

The work place should be the place where you are enjoying pleasure, doing your activities calmly, without headaches, the place you are thinking about knowing you have to do, that you are necessary and indispensable. 

Or, when the situation is opposite, when it’s disorganized, when you use inappropriate language and tone, the volume you are addressing is tough and high, you are losing out of self respect and hope.

I admit I’m affected. I have put all my desire, hope and soul into this project. 

I thought that job is for me, that it defines me and that I will grow up in a family environment, pleasant and warm.

A lesson of life

Although I spent time in that company, I do not regret it. 

I had to learn a few essential things, which I think, polished me aggressively and purposefully:

  1. First of all, the world is not pink. Not everyone is your friend and under no circumstances not everyone wants your good;
  2. Nobody will help you in your evolution, and if I want you to ascend, then you are the only person who can assure you;
  3. Be careful about what behavior you are posing to others, be careful what feelings and attitude you give to others around you can be misinterpreted. Do not cry, get up like a pheonix from your ashes and move on;
  4. The key to a successful career is not getting along well with bosses. Perhaps, for the moment, the situation can look like a „morgan girl,” maybe you’ll meet people without self-esteem. Refuse from the start and continue your journey; if you think you are not left alone to carry out your activities, leave.
  5. Every person has his own worries, needs and aspirations. By insisting yours in front of them not only will not make you grow, but it will make you weak too;
  6. Mind your Language; speaks a little, calm and meaningful. There are some information that may seem insignificant to you, but others are important and secret;
  7. Listen before you talk. You may have more to gain if you pay more attention to the words of others, you may avoid a certain failure;
  8. Do not rush!!! For me, this was a real chore. Personally, I was extremely quick and messy, I did not listen to the end, and I was doing things quickly and bluntly. When I did this and did things in logic and calm, they reproached that I was slow and that I dont think logically; people wanted to believe what they had first guessed about me and blamed me for the defect, even though I corrected it.
    9.
    Do not lose yourself in front of people with „grades”. In the face of God, we are all equal, the fact that there are certain persons with higher functions than you should not intimidate. Look in the eye seriously, and speak. If you are right and did what is right, then there should be no problems.
  9. Appreciate what you have. Although I have changed many jobs throughout my studies, I have never realized that the atmosphere at work can be so important.
  10. Keep a correct posture. Adopt a right position, with no crossed hands and no hands behind. You will look more worthy and more serious.
  11. Thank God. It’s a reason you’ve been through what you’ve been through. Maybe God wanted to try you, to test your abilities and character, to polish you. 

Although you are tired of crossing that mountain, although the final view does not compare to what you expect, what is really important is the journey, the way you have gone and what you have learned.

At the end of this article, I want to emphasize that I do not regret the decision, and that I am not sorry to spend three months at that company. 

I think I have learned important and essential things that will help me in my future job and who will form me as a person in this life.

„The end is neither end nor beginning, but a continuation with all the wisdom that our experience brings us to.” – Hal Borland.