Questions, questions

I have been told once by a person that I used to like that I don’t know what I want, and that I tend to hover a lot about powerful decisions. I guess that his acknowledgment got me off guard at that time, and accepted it as a truth.

I am only 24 at this moment, but things started making sense, and I got to have my own opinions about what I think, about the world and myself. I am not perfect, I got my big life full of messy things, and I continue making mistakes and learning from them.

I never actually knew what I wanted from life, truthfully speaking. I only learned as I went, stepping on shards of glass and at times, found my comfort zone on a fluffy carpet.

Life has thrown me out into circumstances that I did not realize I could go through, I laughed at the danger, trusted unworthy people, smiled when life got critical and said thank you to enemies.

One normal person could say that I am crazy and maybe, way too naive for this mean world, but hey, that’s just me. I don’t know for how long I can keep the spark of goodness within me, but I know that I still want to be kind, when everybody else is yelling and swearing around me.

If I don’t always have answers to life’s biggest questions, it’s okay. Nobody really knows anything, we discover as we go. Clues and hints are present at all steps if we have faith and believe in ourselves.


At the end of the day, you need to take some for yourself while sipping that hot cup of tea, and understand that you only need to live for now, without worrying about what you want, but what makes you happy. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.

(Image Source – Unsplash, Kira auf der Heide)

32 de gânduri despre “Questions, questions

  1. “Spark of goodness within.” Where did that come from; have you asked yourself? Do you perceive correctly that in this messed-up “mean” world there is absolute goodness and simultaneously absolute evil? These two are the dichotomy of life the duality of what the struggle is all about! They both vie for your heart and soul or what it takes for true absolute love and freedom to exist within individual hearts and souls not automatons; and as you see in today’s world so easily with the advent of instantaneous global digital communication there are so many people doing wicked and horrific things each day as sure as the sun rises; but, all the while there are those individuals that fight the good fight, and like Abraham Lincoln who is one of my favorite top three historical figures referred to such persons at his First Inaugural Address Monday, March 4, 1861 how they respond and as he indicated his own conviction, “that “touched” once more by “the better angels of our nature,” but, I add though they struggle more than most to hold onto the good, they find the inner strength to persevere and bring out that, “spark of good within” themselves and encourage it in others; as I see them, as sort of the Don Quixote like heroes in their relentless journey to “follow that star of hope.” I temper this with the brutal reality and fact that naivety can make one a target of the nefarious ugliness that roams the earth seeking only to ruin, which I personally know about from my having to contend with this very fact multiple times; but, I would rather deal with that as it comes as a challenge; than to toss in the towel and join the parade of fools, or even worse the wicked; thinking to appease evil’s thirst for my blood with allegiance; I kiss no ass! I walk alone at times, but, proudly of my own accord and on my own merits, trusting that my guidance will always come from above, the only source of absolute truth and love will watch over me; therefore I never truly walk alone! Now keeping in mind what I’ve said so far, do you think all of this is happening in a void and for no reason outside of what we puny fragile beings are capable of extrapolating regarding the why from all of this on our own, or is it more evident that the most high consciousness and power is totally aware of all we are facing and allows it to unfold toward a better end or the ultimate meaning and purpose, the final goal which is absolute love? I don’t mean love in the mere sense of what we contrive love to be, but, an absolute love that is actually never-ending and totally filling; a perfection that does exist far outside of our capabilities to fathom or produce. Could it be that this life as short or as long as it may be for an individual is just a beginning spark that we must strive to foster and protect “so that one day in the future” it will ignite and produce an eternal flame that will never be extinguished. As children and most certainly by the time we are adults we always know the difference between right and wrong, so too was that just in us by chance or accident? I see it clearly that we are tested over time, to choose the path to righteousness and that eternal love; or go in the opposite direction which is the path to damnation and total abandonment. Now, to cut to the chase so this won’t be too long and boring, let’s just consider from human history any historical figure that may have brought insight and truth to humanity like no one else did or could, and that truth was revealed over many centuries indeed millennia very specifically through prophecy and actual witnessed as well as recorded or documented events, that spoke to these questions very clearly and in such a way that nobody else could equal or duplicate and was obviously over time becoming even more valid as world events and all those previous prophecies become more self-evident and pronounced making it abundantly clear that the choice remains the same and is ours to make, each and every one of us; which is, do we want that eternal peace and endless love or would we rather choose to be destructive to others and our own lives in this world of constant conflict.
    Katherine, let me end this for now where I ended the last long comment to another of your articles with those very same words, which I just noticed I think not coincidentally, actually fits this communication to a “T” which I believe it was meant to. To me this is additional evidence of God at work in our lives.
    “And, how would we love Him genuinely unless we had the opportunity to grow, or “evolve” as unique individuals who will decide for themselves, not controlled or manipulated, but, truly love God with all of our hearts of our own desire or volition!”
    God bless you and yours,

    • I do agree about how God works in our lives as he gives us purpose & place to find & talk to him as we talk to friends in this world. He has made us & let us make our own decisions & shows us an ultimate way that helps others around us bring love & joy & passion to & for him.

      • Very well said! We are so far from fully understanding in our ability of comprehending God, who is beyond human comprehension, but, we are made in God’s image; to me meaning we are connected to Him by the Holy Spirit of God Himself, and, are given free will to act in accordance with “His will,” which is Holy and Absolute; that does reach us through our hearts, as we live and interact with each other we can grow in an appreciation of God and feel as well, as we grow in our love for Him during this life which is so short and serves as a trial birth process as I see it. Of course we make mistakes He has already pointed that out over the millennia showing us how that can be overcome and He will offer anyone who believes in Him and tries their best; the “pure loving salvation” we so desperately need. Without Him and His plan we are doomed and it would be a fool’s errand in my eyes to live such a pointless life! We are truly blessed to be here now having this amazing opportunity, like a job in a way, and, I had some jobs I loved and others I hated, but, they were just manmade jobs and what we have from God is the best job there could ever be; an opportunity to know Him and then be with Him forever in joy, love and happiness beyond our wildest imagination! That will be our payment in full if we act in accordance with His perfect loving will.
        Thanks for the excellent comment and sincere thought you put into it! God bless.

  2. Some people know what they want in life and which direction they want ti to go, others (like me) don’t really know and go with the flow, being dragged along by events, chance meetings and fate.
    Even if someone did have plans, this year, 2020 has invariably dragged us in all sorts of strange directions, some good, some not so good.
    Despite the best plans you might have, fate will drag you in the most unexpected directions whether you like it or not.

  3. Este normal să fi așa la această frumoasă vârstă. Oricum prea multe schimbări nu vor avea loc nici mai târziu, doar faptul că te mai fortifici puțin și vei trăi mai atent cu tine..
    Lupte sunt tot timpul pe „tabla” vieții, așa că tu ești un suflet bun și treci cu capul sus peste toate..
    Weekend frumos îți doresc Katy dragă ☺️ !!!

  4. People always told me that when you meet the one, you just know. I never understood what they meant until I met my wife. She just felt like home.

    Hopefully this helps.

  5. Trust me, you’ll make mistakes later in life as well. The important thing, as you very well say, is to learn from them and move on. You’re a strong person, Kat! Bravo!

  6. Questions have answers & we just need to go 1 step at a time to say we want something & God will provide for us at all costs. God does not answer right away but to answer when most needful.
    Have a great day everyday as you rise & conquer those questions with answers Kat!

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