Song of the day #145

Anxiety and fear

Hello, my dear writers and readers! It’s been a full week going on, and I haven’t posted so much because of my worries and stressful tasks. At times, I just wanted to get my things done so that I can relax or better said, sleep. It was a good plan altogether but it did not work as I have planned.

As you know from my previous posts, I have been excited about returning to the dentist and had my hopes up. That lasted just until I have arrived at the cabinet, of course. On that day it rained a lot, hence I had to walk because I missed the bus, took a tooth radiography, and went to the dentist.

Unfortunately, this lady had an examination team over to their cabinet, due to the Covid-19 Situation, and I had to wait for two hours in the rain and cold. In the morning when I left it was like 30 degrees Celsius, and then it turned out to 15.

When I arrived to see her, I don’t know if I was shaking because I was afraid of the procedure or because of the cold weather. She felt pity for me, and we eventually, had to reschedule the tooth surgery because I have also had an infection. Great!

Now a new treatment is required, and I haven’t even managed to finish the one for chronic gastritis and H. Pylori. This stress and anxiety made it worse for the stomach affection, and now it hurts again.

I’ve been alone mostly this week, and I just felt so stressed about work, knowing that the project will end in a few months, and I have had so many negative thoughts in my mind, that I almost can’t describe. I’ve even considering applying for other jobs to be assured in the future.

Plus, I have to work two weekends, and we should return to the office, things that I can’t do yet because of my tooth infection and the medical procedures. This, and because the office has the air conditioner too strong.

This week I felt the need to cry, to scream, to disappear. I feel so overwhelmed with everything, and I am very anxious. But this needs to end, and I have to get back on the right track. Even if it’s hard and painful, I have to be faithful and trust God, knowing that this too, shall pass.

(Image Source – Unsplash, Katherine Gu)